Decisions.

So lately,
A lot of people have been telling me that i made a mistake about my "decision".
I chose one thing over another,
And apparently i'm just going to end up hurt again.
I've been thinking a lot and perhaps they're right,
But i know that whether it is right or not,
Its what i want.
Sometimes you can't choose what is best for you,
Rather what makes you feel more content with.
I probably will regret my decision somewhere along the way,
But i made up my mind,
And i'll stick with it til the very end.
Whether i receive happiness or pain from my decision,
I'll accept it.
I've been through so much shit with this "decision",
That i really don't care anymore.
I don't mind settling for less,
Not getting what i deserve,
Not being treated the way i would want.
In life,
You have to value what you have,
Because there are many people who would kill to be where you are.
I look upon life with sad, pessimistic views,
But that's only because i pass through life,
Driven by selfishness.
But now,
I'm willing to lose my pride and dignity,
Over this "decision".
And i won't care.
Everyone tells me that i should care,
And my dignity is everything.
They say that when i have nothing left,
My dignity will still be there,
And that's all that matters.
But i think,
What will dignity do for me,
If i have nothing to dignify?
If i chose my alternative option,
Would i truly be happy?
Could i really grow to fully accept it?
Maybe.
But this is my last chance,
To do what feels best,
What brings me more happiness then anything in this world.
Am i being naive?
Perhaps.
But i know that happiness is short-lived,
So why not enjoy it while it lasts.
Before the sadness kicks in,
I'll embrace the positives of my "decision",
And i'll feel that sensation i once felt before.
I understand all the consequences of my actions,
And i have full consent on the conditions.
Right now...
I want to do what i think would make me happier,
No matter how much pain i endure after or during,
I know it will be worth it.
And if it isn't,
Then i guess that is just another cold lesson i will learn on my journey through life.
For now,
I do not know how things will turn out.
So i'll keep waiting...
Waiting til my "decision" is fully enforced...